Morning Struggles as a Parent
As a mom, I often wished there had been more support in schools for both kids and parents. That’s why I now see how powerful Social Emotional Learning for Parents and children can be.
Mornings in my house used to start with chaos. At 6:00 am, my alarm would ring, and all I wanted was to pull the covers back over my head. Getting my kids up and ready for school was never easy. There were arguments, threats of losing phones, video games, and TV privileges even the “grounded for life” punishment.
My husband worked third shift, so most mornings I handled it alone. On the rare days he was home, things went smoothly. He couldn’t understand why I always seemed so frazzled, but those mornings without him were exhausting.
Two Children, Two Different Journeys
My son went to school for the social part. Homework and authority weren’t his thing. Somehow, he kept his grades up, often by sleeping through class, waking just long enough to pass the test, then going right back to sleep. He had behavior challenges at both home and school. At seventeen, he withdrew from high school. Yet when he took his GED, his scores were so high that he qualified for college honors courses.
My daughter was the opposite. She was quiet, shy, and struggled with separation anxiety. In elementary school, she cried almost every morning at the bus stop, and I cried with her. She nearly failed kindergarten because she wouldn’t speak to her teacher during a required test. While my son advanced because of his social skills, I feared my daughter would be held back because of her silence.
Discovering the Challenges Behind the Struggles
Through middle and high school, my daughter continued to struggle, while my son never took school seriously. I spoke with teachers, counselors, and principals, desperate for answers. Some suggestions worked for a little while, but the morning chaos always returned.
Eventually, my son was diagnosed with ADHD and Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD). My daughter was diagnosed in high school with Inattentive ADD. Looking back, I regret being so hard on her. When she said she couldn’t focus, I told her she wasn’t trying. I didn’t know her brain was wired differently. Her doctor prescribed Adderall, which improved her focus, but she disliked how it made her feel.
The Role of Social Emotional Learning for Parents and Students
When I first learned about Social Emotional Learning for Parents and kids, I realized how much it could have helped my children. SEL provides tools that support students academically, emotionally, and socially.
Resilience Inc.’s Social Emotional Learning program teaches five core topics:
- Self-Awareness
- Self-Management
- Social Awareness
- Relationship Management
- Goal Setting & Effective Decision Making
I believe my son would have benefited most from Self-Management and Goal Setting. My daughter could have gained confidence from Relationship Management and Social Awareness, while also improving her focus through Self-Management.
Why Social Emotional Learning Helps Every Child (and Parent)
Social Emotional Learning for Parents is not just for kids who struggle. It benefits every student, even those who appear to be thriving. And it helps adults, too.
As a mom, wife, and now a college student myself, I’ve put pressure on myself to succeed. My fear of failure can feel overwhelming. But SEL reminds me to focus on progress, not perfection.
Looking Ahead: Hope for the Next Generation
Today, my son is thirty-one and my daughter is twenty-five. They’re both happy, healthy, and doing well. Those chaotic mornings are long behind us, and even the “grounded for life” punishment has been lifted.
Now, my daughter has blessed me with a beautiful granddaughter. She’s four years old, full of joy, and carefree. I hope by the time she starts school, Social Emotional Learning for Parents and children will be part of the curriculum. If it is, my daughter may be spared the stress and heartbreak I once felt, and my granddaughter will have the tools she needs to enjoy school and thrive.
For now, I’ll set my alarm, roll out of bed, pour my coffee, and wait for my favorite call, the one from my daughter or granddaughter sharing how their morning went.